Conflict Leadership | Transitions Intl
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Build A Communication Style You Can Be Proud Of

I was coaching one of my clients the other day and when I asked how would he like to “reframe” his communication, he remarked, no use saying whatever I have to say if it is not received by my audience properly. Wow. Indeed, communication is not complete, till it is “received”. Communication, be it written or verbal, is not complete till your audience understands the message. Written communication, be it email, chats or even a resume is ignored or can be misunderstood if it is not conveyed in a manner that will be understood by the receiver. Poor communication often results in frustration, ineffective meetings, misunderstandings, complicated relationships, lost time, lost revenues and overall goals remaining unachieved. What are some of the 101s of communication? 1.Language that is easy to understand We often live in our own world, using jargon and terms which our audience may not necessarily understand. 2.Connect We are emotional beings and connection takes place at an emotional level. Conversations, where a level of rapport and trust is established is when a connection happens. Connect with the other person's personal interests and topics of interest. 3.Listen Listening does not happen just with your ears but also with your eyes, heart and soul. Listening to understand and

4 Simple Steps To Engage In An Interesting Conversation

I received a personal note of Thank you from one of my clients who had been coached by me recently. He had his biggest breakthrough in that he was able to sort out his relationship with his business partner which had been on a rough terrain over the past two years, before he started his coaching. ⇒How often does our relationships with friends, trusted colleagues or other near and dear ones go pear shaped because of interpretations that we make of events and behaviors or reactions of others? Life is full of interpretations and yet there are some incidents of people's behaviors, actions and reactions which interpreted in our own way leads to many a challenging conversation thereafter. Each of us form stories in our own head, of things that happen in our daily life which includes interpreting some of our conversations. Every party to the conversation run their own stories in their head because of different perspectives and some of these perspectives, when not clarified, adds to the complexity in a relationship and the conversation not so pleasant. Imagine you receive an email from one of your colleagues whom you have observed with behaviors which makes a conversation uncomfortable and tense. The

How To Avoid Wasting Money and Time on Training ?

Billions of dollars are spent annually on Training and development within organizations, without commensurate Return On Investment. (Tens of billions of dollars are spent on it annually, but companies often squander these investments because the training is not geared to drive business results, say experts at The Boston Consulting Group (BCG)). Organizations invest in soft skills training and development to manage talent, to enhance leadership, communication and other soft skills amongst their employees. Transitions occurs in taking on new roles, new challenges, managing a new team, new responsibilities, new countries or even with a different team or boss. This often results in many employees feeling challenged with their leadership, communication and influential skills. Coaching and training can help in enhancement or a shift in these soft skills. There is a clear need for training and coaching within organizations. Yet, what are some of the reasons for the gap between the need for training and development and the resultant ROI? 1.Training is often not geared to drive results, based on which those who receive training are being evaluated. 2.Training is often a “band aid” solution to fix a deeper problem or challenge that may exist within an organization. 3.Training is conducted in those areas which are not

Three Keys To Be An Impactful Communicator

"This is urgent. So please get it done ASAP" "Can you call between 9 am to 10 am?" "I would like to meet you sometime next week or so". "Can you tell her I called?" "Client is livid, can you look into it when you get a moment, please ?" What is the common problem you see in all of the above communication? Have you been in situations when you have told somebody it is urgent or ASAP and yet your request has not been met within your specified deadline? Has this caused you frustration and increased your stress and overwhelm? However, did you use specific language in your request or your instruction ? Let's take another scenario "I'm not sure I can do this" "I'm sure, I'm going to mess it up and not be able to make that presentation properly" "I'm not going to do this interview well" "I am in no good at public speaking. I suck at making presentations in front of a group of people. Does this form of self-communication sound familiar to you? There are three factors to impactful Communication, those that lead to inspiring and influencing others or what is often known as leadership communication 1. How do you communicate with yourself? Your thoughts lead to your inner talk. Is that empowering or

Leadership In Troubled Times

The CEO of the Company was having his monthly meeting with his direct reports to discuss achievements, strengths, opportunities missed or well used and way forward. Jack, the CFO of the company had attended several of these meetings and felt the quality of these meetings had deteriorated. In the moments of silence, whenever he was an observer, he felt these meetings had become agreeable in nature and no brainstorming was encouraged. Just in the last meeting he had raised an objection to the way the revenues were being earned and the way the company was going about increasing its market share and how in the medium to long-term the company may not be able to hold its market share. He also had concerns on the franchise value which he thought he will bring it up later. Despite presenting solutions he was left with the feeling that by raising a different perspective, he was considered possibly a rebel. The room didn't celebrate his passion for the business nor appreciate his concern. "Don't trouble trouble till trouble troubles you because if you trouble trouble, trouble will trouble you". As a kid I used to play this tongue twister with my friends. Today in many organizations and

The Power Of Reframing

Have you been in meetings where you interpret something that has been said by your boss very differently from what one of your colleagues may have interpreted? Have you had moments or days when you feel everything is going wrong, until you see someone else having a worse time which pales yours in comparison? Have you observed situations where two people could have faced the same situation, yet one considers it as a challenge to be overcome whereas the other person dwells on it, complains about it and their body language and facial expression conveys that they are having one a nerve wrecking experience? How many times have you for any small mistakes made, stated that "I have messed up" instead of "I made a mistake"? When I coach leaders, executives and professionals, I hear negative statements about who they are or what they are not good at or what they cannot do. The cues is not only verbal but also in their body language and facial expressions. When I listen to what is being said, the way it is being said and sense the cues, I ask of my clients to reframe the thought, the feeling, the fear in a positive way. Reframing is the art

Leadership Lessons From The Movie “42″

Life offers the strangest twists and turns for some of us. Some of these challenges agonizes you, tortures you and you are left wondering what did you do wrong? Why “me”? I’ve always considered life’s challenges as a way to learn and when I get into a negative mode, I realize that negativity pulls me down further and I need to bounce back from that thinking. In my journey to date, I have been inspired by my parents, some of my friends, my family, people whom I’ve read about or met, books that I’ve read and some of the movies that I’ve watched. I saw the movie “42” recently. 42 tells the story of Jackie Robinson and, under the guidance of team executive Branch Rickey, Robinson’s signing with the Brooklyn Dodgers to become the first African-American player to break the baseball color barrier. The story focuses mostly on the 1947 Brooklyn Dodgers season and somewhat on Robinson’s 1946 season with the Montreal Royals. Drag your thoughts away from your troubles…by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it. – Mark Twain Jackie Robinson, despite support from Branch Rickey and later from some of his team members, was not without troubles and hardships. His color

The Zen of Conflict Leadership – 5 Keys to deal with Conflicts

"The better able team members are to engage, speak, listen, hear, interpret, and respond constructively, the more likely their teams are to leverage conflict rather than be leveled by it” Runde and Flanagan Conflict is not something many of us like to be in. Many situations of conflict create a feeling of fight or flight. It triggers a lot of negative emotions including anger, turmoil and a sense of threat. But is conflict really that bad at all times ? Is it possible to accept conflict as a learning process ? Peace is not the absence of conflict but it is the ability to deal with Conflict by way of creative alternatives to respond to situations of conflict. What is Conflict ? Conflict arises from differences of opinion. It arises when people disagree over values, ideas, perceptions or even when led by different motivations. Conflicts cannot be avoided because no two people can agree on everything at all times.  A better way to resolve conflicts is not to avoid it or runaway from it but deal with it in a constructive and positive manner.  Confidence comes from knowing that you have the skills to communicate in a difficult situation, and you have the ability to diagnose the situation accurately