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How Do You Deal With The Anxiety Trap?

Anxiety is probably at its peak right now, especially in many parts of Asia, given the coronavirus situation. Change, especially in some forms creates anxiety on individuals as well as on organizations. How does anxiety in an individual affect organizations and how does an organization or the system create anxiety within individuals? What is the impact of this? Andrea Foot and I look at Anxiety and its impact in a series of videos of which this ciip is the first.     Image source: shutterstock.com            

Build A Communication Style You Can Be Proud Of

I was coaching one of my clients the other day and when I asked how would he like to “reframe” his communication, he remarked, no use saying whatever I have to say if it is not received by my audience properly. Wow. Indeed, communication is not complete, till it is “received”. Communication, be it written or verbal, is not complete till your audience understands the message. Written communication, be it email, chats or even a resume is ignored or can be misunderstood if it is not conveyed in a manner that will be understood by the receiver. Poor communication often results in frustration, ineffective meetings, misunderstandings, complicated relationships, lost time, lost revenues and overall goals remaining unachieved. What are some of the 101s of communication? 1.Language that is easy to understand We often live in our own world, using jargon and terms which our audience may not necessarily understand. 2.Connect We are emotional beings and connection takes place at an emotional level. Conversations, where a level of rapport and trust is established is when a connection happens. Connect with the other person's personal interests and topics of interest. 3.Listen Listening does not happen just with your ears but also with your eyes, heart and soul. Listening to understand and

The One Trait Every Human Being Must Have

Recently, I delivered a workshop to 400 university students. There were two sessions and each session was attended by approximately 400 students. The duration of each session was for 2 hours. Since the number in the audience was large, this workshop would be different in that it would involve least amount of interaction or group activities. In the first session, I had planned on some interaction by way of asking questions, or having them discuss some of the questions asked or doing the activity with the person sitting next to them. I realized that even this limited interaction was not yielding the desired results. I still attempted different ways in order to get the students to interact but overall participation was at a bare minimum. In session 2, the topic was the same as session 1 and thus the content was the same. Based on what I observed in Session 1, I realized that I have to change my structure, examples and make the presentation as a lecture but in a conversational style, to achieve the desired impact. I had to adapt to the requirements on the fly, had to think on my feet, yet remain calm and impactful. [Tweet "#Adaptability is a

4 Simple Steps To Engage In An Interesting Conversation

I received a personal note of Thank you from one of my clients who had been coached by me recently. He had his biggest breakthrough in that he was able to sort out his relationship with his business partner which had been on a rough terrain over the past two years, before he started his coaching. ⇒How often does our relationships with friends, trusted colleagues or other near and dear ones go pear shaped because of interpretations that we make of events and behaviors or reactions of others? Life is full of interpretations and yet there are some incidents of people's behaviors, actions and reactions which interpreted in our own way leads to many a challenging conversation thereafter. Each of us form stories in our own head, of things that happen in our daily life which includes interpreting some of our conversations. Every party to the conversation run their own stories in their head because of different perspectives and some of these perspectives, when not clarified, adds to the complexity in a relationship and the conversation not so pleasant. Imagine you receive an email from one of your colleagues whom you have observed with behaviors which makes a conversation uncomfortable and tense. The

Five Keys To Establishing and Building Trust in A Relationship

Last Friday, I watched The Money Monster. There is a scene where Lee Gates (George Clooney) walks out of his studio with Kyle Budwell (Jack O'Connell), a grief-stricken bankrupt viewer who lost his money after a previous tip; in front of him, a sharp contrast to moments earlier where Lee Gates was held hostage by Kyle Budwell. However, with the negotiations that followed between Lee Gates and Kyle Budwell, a certain degree of trust is established. Since Lee Gates does not want to get shot by the police, who are trying to disarm his bomb, he hides behind, Kyle, with Kyle walking in front of him. Lee  convinces Kyle that the person because of whom Kyle lost his money is there, and they can question him together. The movie is particularly not interesting but this scene somehow captured my attention because of the rapport that Lee Gates builds with Kyle Budwell who had held him hostage. There is a trust that each of them place on the other, a degree of  belief in each other and their common goal is to find this person on account of whom this grievance was caused. Trust is an essential part of any relationship be it with your partner, your

Four Keys To The Power Of Consistency

Recently at my yoga and gym classes at Pure Yoga and Pure Fitness, I have observed that the different instructors follow a sequence in a particular week, which is consistent throughout that week, for that particular style of class. Not every class of the same style [e.g. TRX (suspension training) or Body Combat or RPM] has every single move and flow the same across different days and instructors in a particular week. But there are some moves common across the same class on different days during any given week. This consistency brings uniformity across classes and you as a participant is able to practice it consistently and improve your way of doing it. In addition, the instructors don't play what they want but send a uniform and consistent message. Each instructor is unique and with the consistency that they follow, it becomes easier for the participants as well as for the instructors to deliver their best. Thus the brand name and franchise value is enhanced. I appreciate consistency, especially as a Dale Carnegie trainer, because as Dale Carnegie trainers, when we deliver flagship programs and other tailored in-house corporate programs, we need to maintain consistency in the overall way we facilitate and

Six Ways To Be An Impactful Communicator

Yesterday whilst in my yoga class, the instructor was giving us a specific instruction. She was very clear in her instruction and it so happened that the woman next to me had her left leg in front instead of her right leg. The instructor noticed this and kept repeating her instruction to this woman and only after a good 30-40 seconds that the woman internalized the instruction and did the right thing. I was thinking about this incident on my way back to work and realized that many times at the gym, yoga or even at trainings that I facilitate for various corporates, many participants do not do what has been instructed or requested of them. This happens not because the instructions are not clear or the language not understood but the individual/s concerned are not listening. Their focus is on something else. They are not in the moment. They hear and yet they don't listen. [Tweet "#Listening to #connect happens when you #listen to understand. #communication #EI #leadership"] What does LISTEN mean ? 1.Learn Learn to recognize your shortcomings and accept yourself. Ask yourself, what can you do to bring back focus? Have an open mind and intention to listen. [Tweet "#Listening with an open

Four REAL Ways To Create Customer Service Excellence

√Customer Service Excellence is the single most distinguishing factor to maintain critical competitive advantage - LR√ During one of our travels, one of the airlines in China cancelled our flight and they sent us an email asking us to call them. When we did, we went back and forth for the next 3 hours, , sandwiched between the bureaucracy of two airlines. As it happened, we had booked our entire journey through one airline, and we had to use the other airline for one sector. Every customer service person of the airline that we had booked our flights through kept telling us to speak to the other airline and that they could not reissue the ticket to the new flight following the cancellation by the other airline because they had nothing to do with the cancellation. After spending over 3 hours, we finally managed to speak to the manager and get the situation resolved. This experience left us exhausted, frustrated and not wanting to return back to that place. It showed lack of care, empathy and above all, we were made to feel as if they were obliging us (the customer), when the airline had decided to cancel a flight. In

Four Mindful Ways To Be More Effective

One of my friends is into mindfulness and has engaged in it for past several years. In almost every conversation with him, I have observed that he gets irritated with something that has happened or something that is about to happen. Yet, he is quick to clarify that mindfulness has helped him and he swears by it. I am not sure why he offers this clarification every time. Mindfulness and courses on mindfulness has grown in geometric progression in the past two years. Anything with a mindfulness angle surely gets noticed. ⇒Are all those who talk about mindfulness and those who promote mindfulness, always mindful ? ⇒How can we be mindful in the time driven world of ours? Does it necessarily involve hours of practice, silent retreats and meditation?⇐ I read an interesting article on HBR that piqued my interest The title of that article was Mindfulness -Search Inside Yourself It talks about "just six seconds of mindfulness" can make you more effective. The crux of this article which caught my attention is that you can do away with the mental baggage, during your day, when you approach each new situation with a present, focused mind. You achieve a calm and agitation free mind by consciously taking one

How To Avoid Wasting Money and Time on Training ?

Billions of dollars are spent annually on Training and development within organizations, without commensurate Return On Investment. (Tens of billions of dollars are spent on it annually, but companies often squander these investments because the training is not geared to drive business results, say experts at The Boston Consulting Group (BCG)). Organizations invest in soft skills training and development to manage talent, to enhance leadership, communication and other soft skills amongst their employees. Transitions occurs in taking on new roles, new challenges, managing a new team, new responsibilities, new countries or even with a different team or boss. This often results in many employees feeling challenged with their leadership, communication and influential skills. Coaching and training can help in enhancement or a shift in these soft skills. There is a clear need for training and coaching within organizations. Yet, what are some of the reasons for the gap between the need for training and development and the resultant ROI? 1.Training is often not geared to drive results, based on which those who receive training are being evaluated. 2.Training is often a “band aid” solution to fix a deeper problem or challenge that may exist within an organization. 3.Training is conducted in those areas which are not