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4 Simple Steps To Engage In An Interesting Conversation

I received a personal note of Thank you from one of my clients who had been coached by me recently. He had his biggest breakthrough in that he was able to sort out his relationship with his business partner which had been on a rough terrain over the past two years, before he started his coaching. ⇒How often does our relationships with friends, trusted colleagues or other near and dear ones go pear shaped because of interpretations that we make of events and behaviors or reactions of others? Life is full of interpretations and yet there are some incidents of people's behaviors, actions and reactions which interpreted in our own way leads to many a challenging conversation thereafter. Each of us form stories in our own head, of things that happen in our daily life which includes interpreting some of our conversations. Every party to the conversation run their own stories in their head because of different perspectives and some of these perspectives, when not clarified, adds to the complexity in a relationship and the conversation not so pleasant. Imagine you receive an email from one of your colleagues whom you have observed with behaviors which makes a conversation uncomfortable and tense. The

How Are You Living Your Values?

It is Friday evening and you are looking forward to your long  overdue vacation. You are working on the final touches of your proposal to get a new line of business approved. The proposal is almost ready barring some details on some legal challenges that you are  awaiting from your legal department. You receive the legal opinion and when you read it, you realize that a key element is missing. Not considering this aspect might hurt the franchise of the business in the future. The only person aware about this is you and none else. What would you do? Would you rather let it go because you’ll never be found out or blamed or would you listen to your inner voice which tells you how important it is to highlight this specific legal risk. What is this inner voice that whispers to you at various moments in your day and life. A whisper to the effect “There is no way you can do that. it’s not right”. Each of us have core values whether we realize it or not. Core values is what is imbibed in us from the day we are born. Some values we instill in us as we are growing. Values sit within

Are You A Leader or a Manager ?

A great person attracts great people and knows how to hold them together - Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe Leadership and management go hand in hand but yet we have great managers who may not be great leaders. Have you identified why? Have you had a high turnover because of your manager ? Have you analyzed the traits of the team and those of the manager - High D,or C or S or I?  Most of you may associate with the following descriptions of a leader and a manager. Leader – one who inspires others by their actions and behavior. Leadership is a philosophy of life. Leadership is not about managing things but about developing people. It is about helping people to liberate the fullness of their talents while they pursue a vision that you have inspired them to buy into as a worthy and meaningful one. Great leaders are great teachers as well as great coaches. Manager – managers direct and tell their team what to do. They plan for the achievement of day-to-day tasks and the goals of the department or group whom they manage. Managers, by nature, are concerned with outcomes. A leader is not necessarily one with an organizational title but why don't we have more managers

Four Little Known Personality Traits That Could Affect Your Relationships

Picture a scenario in a playground or in a jail where a large bulky kid beats up a small kid or a large honcho in a jail victimizes a relatively weak soul. Most of us can easily associate with this character and the term they are known by is Bully. Bullies are one we either witness as a child or one some of us may have been victimized by. In organizations as well we do face bullies but the behavior is not in the form of beating up somebody physically. The Karpman Triangle describes some habitual roles or positions that people tend to take up in a negative situation or while in conflict. This model suggests that each of us display unconsciously motivated behavioral patterns with the people whom we are in contact with.  There is an unconscious belief/s that drives our behaviors or actions which causes or contributes to evoke a feeling.  This feeling augments beliefs or perceptions about ourselves and others and how we fit in and how we are treated.   Most of these beliefs or perceptions are negative.   The model posts three habitual psychological roles. But research by some of the Coaching Institutes have added a fourth behavior. The three

Change – The Process And 4 Essentials

Change is an integral part of our life. Our physical body undergoes change every day, our cells undergoes change and the very process of growing up from the time we are born to where we are today is Change. The environment around us is changing all the time. Some changes are within our control and yet others not so. There are yet other changes which we need to make consciously - the ability to be present and move between reflection and action. It is our ability to establish and maintain the appropriate attitudes and behaviors in both our professional and personal lives, that are conducive to goal setting, achievement and constructive feedback. To quote Tim Gallwey - "In every human endeavor there are two arenas of engagement: the outer and the inner. The outer game is played on an external arena to overcome external obstacles to reach an external goal. The inner game takes place within the mind of the player and is played against such obstacles as fear, self-doubt, lapses in focus, and limiting concepts or assumptions. The inner game is played to overcome the self-imposed obstacles that prevent an individual or team from accessing their full potential." In simple terms