“This is urgent. So please get it done ASAP“
“Can you call between 9 am to 10 am?”
“I would like to meet you sometime next week or so“.
“Can you tell her I called?”
“Client is livid, can you look into it when you get a moment, please ?”
What is the common problem you see in all of the above communication?
Have you been in situations when you have told somebody it is urgent or ASAP and yet your request has not been met within your specified deadline?
Has this caused you frustration and increased your stress and overwhelm?
However, did you use specific language in your request or your instruction ?
Let’s take another scenario
“I’m not sure I can do this”
“I’m sure, I’m going to mess it up and not be able to make that presentation properly”
“I’m not going to do this interview well”
“I am in no good at public speaking. I suck at making presentations in front of a group of people.
Does this form of self-communication sound familiar to you?
There are three factors to impactful Communication, those that lead to inspiring and influencing others or what is often known as leadership communication
1. How do you communicate with yourself?
Your thoughts lead to your inner talk. Is that empowering or full of self-doubt, fear and one that lacks confidence?
Your internal dialogue is reflected by your attitude (can do, need to do, will do), your ability and willingness to learn and step out of your comfort zone.
2. How do you communicate with others one-on-one?
Dale Carnegie, The author of How to Win Friends and Influence People (1936),
-> Become genuinely interested in other people.
-> Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves
-> Talk in terms of other person’s interest
-> Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.
-> Show respect for the other person’s opinion and never say you are wrong.
These form part of his Human Relations Principle which is the core in Establishing Rapport, Strengthening Relations and Influencing People.
Are you specific in the language you use to make your requests and instructions?
Do you communicate directly? Direct communication is misunderstood by many as being disrespectful. You can be direct in the way you communicate, be assertive and yet not be disrespectful. Your tone and your facial expressions have to communicate your genuine intentions.
Many clients who come to me for being coached on a one-on-one basis, struggle with being assertive and the ability to ask questions to clarify when they don’t understand something or need some more information or resources.
Be honest about what you can do and what you can’t. Giving your commitment to something you cannot do and not communicating that properly only results in you damaging your reputation and credibility.
Avoid vague language like ASAP, urgent. Specifying what you mean by urgent is important because urgent may mean within the next 1 hour to you, while it may mean within 24 hours to your listener.
3. How to communicate persuasively with a group?
A persuasive communicator is someone who not only conveys a strong verbal message but also engages the audience, cares about what interests the audience, is concise, effectively uses visuals and is aligned in terms of their facial expressions and body language.
Your content is important and so are the structure and the way you deliver the message to the audience.
What are some of the challenges you face in making your communication impactful?
How do you communicate when you are stressed out?
What kind of self-talk do you engage in and what is the resultant impact on the results you seek to achieve?
Would love to hear your comments.